10:44 PM, Friday, Jun. 11, 2010
Dude I am so sorry Joanna for forgetting to call you. I feel like such a guy, forgetting to call you even when I say I will, and I've been meaning to call you for like weeks now. Fuck I'm so forgetful.
When I remember, I'm like, okay, remember to call in half and hour. And then I don't remember again until like one day later. Shit I feel so bad.
You know I really want to get this over and done with. I don't even know if this stuff will work. I feel like you've changed so much, like I have, but I don't know if this will mean we'll still be the same together as before. Will we? I feel like you're distancing yourself from me, so I can't help but do that too. I seriously don't know you anymore.
I'm so very, very afraid.
Will you accept me for what I have become? Will I accept you for what you have become? This feels so awkward and hard and annoying.
Am I the only one who's like this?
Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck this.