6:11 p.m., 23/06/2007
yo! long time no see! lotsa stuff to write. will no longer be bothered to put capitals in front of sentences. though the ooccasional capital will appear every now and then...
Pim is SOOO obsessed with 4. She talks about him everyday. Its so annoying. At first, i thought she wasn't that interested right? but then she started getting all excited after he talks to her on msn. oh wow. so interesting. wtf. anyways she's like, "i love him." and i'm just like, "get a life." pffft.
She's like, sad 'coz she can't get over him. but then like, i don't think she WANTS to get over him. Like, there's herself who likes him, then theres the respnsible side that comes in. Sigh. She's got this therapy book for it. She's obsessed over that. She's drawing pictures - like deep picture book pictures - and answering questions about him.
i'm like: why do u like him?
answer: not like...love!
me: ergh... too strong... uh... i'll just say like
pim: but i don't just LIKE him i LOVE him
me: *shivers* well then whenever i say like you can translate it to love. happy?
pim: ok
She's like, he says really obvious stuff and i think that deep inside - even though he said he didn't - he likes...<3s (replacement for the forbidden word. i dont like it used this way) me.
So i shoot, "if he doesn't <3 you, would you let him go?" it was a really good question that was MEANT to help. BUT NO i get this really corny answer:
"Of course not. Becuase i know deep inside he <3s me too. We <3 each other. And we will live togehter and be together forever."
Like, she must be crazy.
Tiffany knows. Jaya knows. Kendy knows. Shelley knows. Lots of people know. Sandra... was kinda away alot around the spilling-beans time so she doesn't really get it but she got the idea. Its so sad. Whenever i talk to her now, she always ends up talking about 4. i hate him now. I really do. But then, i sorryrize for him. I do beleive he don't got any feelings for her, like he said himself (why would he lie?).
you know, even though pim and me are real close and are real similar, she and i are very different too. Like, she kinda writes poems, talks about 4, draws in her therapy book and stuff like that, she kinda does it in class. In the wrong classes too like maths, english and chinese. And i draw and stuff in english (but i'm only half in it 'coz its an ok subject that i gotsta do preperly) and geography (i hate it she loves it) and japanese (coz class is so slow and i never really learn it 'til several classes later). i mean, i need maths and chinese. maths 'coz u need to do work excersices. Pim must have tonnes of stuff she hasn't done - she's giving it all up for therapy sessions and mooning over 4.
She's a smart kid. She even got lower than me in a maths test. It was only be one mark but still, she's naturally smarter than me at maths. Gosh. how sad is that.
And then, i can listen to almost anyone (excluding Amanda sometimes) talk about themselves. I listen to pim talk about 4 so much, i must be the only one (close one; not including jayas and stuff) that is still listening. OR trying to for that matter. But whenever i need to tell someone about something, she's the only one i got now, and she just tells me to tell her later. In other words, its a dismissal for the subject. Like she's bored of it. Well look at everyone who has to put up with you yabbering on about being sad and happy about loving 4 and stuff.
If she could, she would be a Lowers person. She thinks like them usually. But she can't really be one 'coz she doesn't like Lowers people either.
Hmm... shouldn't be complaining much. She is my best mate at the mo. But lately, she's got a new one-way best mate. Mr Number-4-Richard-Hua. I sorryrize for Pim. One day, all that giving love is gonna break her heart. And when she finally realizes what she's been doing all these months, she's gonna cry. But then she's gonna laugh. I want it
i pray for that day of realisation to come before i get tired of waiting and its too late.