2:50 PM, Saturday, Mar. 27, 2010
Oh my fucking god I'm so bored. I have tonnes of homework to do, but I can't seem to get myself to do it. Because when you're bored, you just can't seem to do work. You only do your work, when you're NOT bored. This making sense? Argh.
I can't go on the computer because we're apparently over usage. Why the fuck do we only get 10GB a month? I'm like a computer-holic and yet I have this shit arse amount which I can't do fuck with.
I can't play the guitar anyway, because Eatrend won't let me play downstairs because he's fucking watching his anime even though the radio's already on. What the fuck. I would screw him over if it wasn't his guitar. He never even plays it anymore. I'm the one who plays it. Then I can't play upstairs, because my mum's sleeping. What the fuck, why doesn't she just sleep in her own room.
Plus, the capo thing with the pencil and the rubber bands thing is not working out. I'm super pissed off from that as well. I don't know whether it's the pencil, or the rubber bands, or the guitar, or just me, or just using this method as a capo but its not working. Especially the E strings which just will NOT be held down. My god. I used THREE rubber bands to hold the pencil down, and it still doesn't work. So I can't play the song I want. Fuck.
I can't take any more pictures on the film cam (up to photo 13) because there is literally NOTHING to take. What, do I take a picture of the grass? The trees? The clothesline? (did that) The car? My backyard is so ugly shit. I can't help but think the pictures will turn out just as shat. Plus it's so sunny outside anyway, which is good for the camera, but burning hot for me to just stand in one spot. The creepy weeds are like flickering past my legs, there's a cobweb in every corner, or a new one floating onto me, and flies keep flying into my shot.
I'm so pissed. And bored. Plus I think I'm PMSing, but that would mean my period's coming like a week early. Not a good combination.
When I'm ranting off to my dad, all he tells me to do is go draw the fucking front of the house, or read some book. What the hell. Not like I don't enjoy doing those things at times, and not like they AREN'T good for me, but I'm a fidgety, impatient, young teenager. Does it look like I can do something so slow and... peaceful right now? And every single time I'm angry and ranting, my parents treat me like I've just committed a deadly sin or something. Can't I be angry? Can't I rant? Should I keep it all fucking in and start having a spaz on the spot before I explode from keeping my bomb inside? I know I shouldn't be so irritated so much, but really, it's only living in this fucking house that drives me nuts sometimes.
Do I have too much time on my hands? Yes I do. I could start scrapbooking, but I have no idea how to make a book out of scratch. I have an idea, but I need fabric and other tools I don't have. Actually since I've calmed down... I might just start doing that now... Yes. Maybe. I seemed to have calmed down considerably since the beginning of this entry. Which is good. Writing here makes me feel good. I'm happy you're here for me. Even though I'm crazy to think I can talk to you like a person. The fuck.
Crazy.