1:49 PM, Sunday, Mar. 07, 2010
Yesterday my dad axed the head of this blue tongue lizard in our garden. Because my mum was scared for our rabbits when my dad suggested it might eat them.
SIF.
Well, I'm not too sure if it was a blue tongue lizard or not, but it was pretty much the same size as a... let's say it looked around 30cm from a 4m distance. Massive though. And it had no legs. But it still looked like a lizard you know? Because it's too... short to be a snake.
Well me and my bro got annoyed at them both. My parents were both proud at the feat (they're such country bumpkins) and I guess they felt a bit disappointed when we sort of dissed them for it.
If he's got so much time to axe a blue tongue lizard (at least he buried it), he should at least get rid of the cluster of three tennis-ball seized wasp/bee nests outside my window ==" I don't use that window at all, but still, it's fucking scary. Three man, THREE.
I still have yet to take some film pictures. Every time I look out, I say, no it doesn't look very nice yet. Or I say, no... we should go somewhere first. Or I say... oh... I can't be bothered to put the batteries in yet. Or something like that.
But really, I'm just afraid. Afraid of disappointment. Wasting my film. The film being a waste. Wasting my money for both. Ergh I don't know. I hate it how I'm so easily swayed by the obstacles of life. I still love it a lot. But. I guess I just want to talk to someone about it.
You know, to keep the fire alive. I wonder how people do it. It's so hard to do stuff that your friends aren't into. You want to share with them your excitement, yet you can't do it too much or else they'll stop listening because they won't have the same feeling as you.
Like, let's say, Amanda and Lauren are so lucky to have each other and their music. It's amazing how they can keep up a convo like that. More amazing is how Amanda knows so many more people who are like that too...
Well I guess I just need to meet more new people yes? But it's hard. It's like, I'm trying to get over my fear of trying something new, so why add to this confusion by trying to add my fear of meeting new people? One step at a time dude.
Anyway. I've sort of just realized that I really like unique female voices. Unique how? I'm not too sure. But here are some examples. Duffy. Lisa Mitchell (sort of...). Julia Stone (From Angus and Julia Stone). And my new thing for the past half and hour: Gin Wigmore. I love her voice. And I love her songs.
Love. Love. Love. Love. Love.
♪♫♪Hey ho~ Nobody knows~ You're not coming home~♪♫
Oh I think I'm getting more in touch with my music. Not like classical music and stuff. More like my music. So what type of music I'm into and stuff. I'm slowly drifting away from mainstream (like how slowly Australia is drifting to India), even though I still love that stuff.
But yeah. I think I really like the... Australiany? Country? Road tripy? I'm not too sure yet but... I'm actually quite excited.
Oh I'm finally on Lookbook so much, I'm seeing the flaws in it. E.g. I realized a lot of why you get hyped/hyped so easily/so quickly is because you have fans. So people follow people and it's sort of a people-based thing as well as fashion. But I guess, there is a reason why people follow them. They ARE really good. But I'm just saying... it's kinda flawed.
Oh did I tell you, I'm into making my own clothes? xD It started last week, when I was bored, and I really want to be able to design my own clothes, or make my own alterations, and one-of-a-kind stuff is so good. I'm already drawing some... not-really-original designs in my artbook on model figures :) Wish I did textiles so I'd at least have some experience.
On another hand, I think because of this, I'm getting more superficial and materialistic by the day. I'm too into clothes and stuff. But it's not that I care about how one looks... sort of... but I just really like a certain type of fashion style you know? Argh it's so hard to get into fashion without being judged.
Argh but even worse is when I don't have a sewing machine that works. AISH. Oh well, I think I'm getting my own sense of self. (Argh English+Pd x__x) Like I'm developing my own... style. As you can see, in music, fashion, hobbies. I only wish I can establish my actual personality you know. Instead of being all boppy everywhere.
But anyway yes. I think I'm slowly heading towards my goals.
:)